Pass the Zoloft, please.

Good Afternoon or Morning or whatever time it is~

I must say, I wish I was of Aztec decent. She looks gorgeous. Let's just face it. There is a lack of pics of gorgeous black women out there. Don't get me wrong, by no means do we hold the last place ribbon on beauty and attractiveness, but we do hold the last place ribbon on art that shows how beautiful we are. What do you normally see with black or African art. Strength, faith, persistence, and sometimes hostility. Never anything like the little Aztec beauty above. Although the closest I could find happens to be one of Disney's Pixie Friends. I pixie named "Lily." Pictured above the Aztec girl. She's adorable, and a start. She even has the booty to boot!!!!!

I'll get off this kick. It seems the more I dwell on this, the less happy I get with America. At least at Pixie Hollow multicultural isn't a word and everyone has an equal stake. Finally something good to teach girls: There's no prince charming, people of all backgrounds can live together and use each other's differences for the common good, and everyone is beautiful. I am beginning to respect the evil empire known as Disney once again.

I have been enjoying the audio book Dearly Devoted Dexter, over the last couple of days, and with much gusto, I rented the first season of Showtime's Dexter a spin off of the books. It was a little slow to get into, but now I'm hooked, give it a shot.

I must leave now. I need to shower and all the other fun stuff involved in getting ready for work. The new Cash Sup should be training today. People come and people go, but it seems your favorite demon is cemented to the floor. My life is an empty snack machine except for the three bags of Munchos. Nobody ever wants the Munchos.

I can't wait to get over this Goddamn depression. As my therapist says, " Your just cycling. We'll continue to monitor your moods and perceptions before we adjust." Adjust my ass. She means shoot tranquilizer darts into the demon. Whatever. At least there would be change.

Sometimes the mind, for reasons we don't necessarily understand, just decides to go to the store for a quart of milk.

Diane Frolov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure, Three Doctors, 1993

Yokai Kifujin

From the depths of the Black Lagoon...

Hello My readers!

From the bottom of the rabbit hole, Alice is slowly finding her way out of wonderland. I know. It's been ages since we spoke last. It seems my depression has cycled back and has left me a shadow of the vibrant and vocal demon I used to be. But I must not let it keep me from the thoughts that flow venomously through my mind. I mean a world without Yokai is simple a world waiting for an Apocalypse.

First of all I just want to say how much I love the art work of Ms. Jasmine Becket-Griffith. Check out her work sometime. I simply adore the girls. I also want to welcome a new reader. Hello. Don't take it all in at once, that could be hazardous to your health. Here I don't ask for approval or acceptance. This is my corner of the world, and I do with it as I please. Main thing, just don't take my words personally. Unless of course you specifically fit the description, then maybe you should rethink your stance.

So has anybody been keeping up with as said on the Daily Show, "Cluster F@ck to the White House?" Trust me I haven't been. All the candidates have reached a new level of grotesque in my mind. Really is there an original thought among them other than how to reword the same idea to make it sound like he or she has a leg up? I mean how many more debates do we have to endure until the collective idiot population of our country realizes that these bitches have nothing productive to say. I hear ideas not plans. I hear back pedalling, blaming, excuses, white lies, and half truths, but no plans. Cleverly worded and mesmerizing ideas, but no definitive plans. Now that's Bitch!!!!! Speaking of the Daily Show, Sen. B. Obama will be on to night.

So what's going on with me. Last month I got word that I would be able to take a typing test for a position in the Worcester Main St post office. I passed it so I'm waiting on stage three. I went to a Army Muster on 8 August. That was painless after watching two PowerPoint presentations. Boy, the Army loves execution by PowerPoint! Here is where I found out that the reign of terror known as IIR ends 5 Jan 08. Lovely. So about 4 months to go until total civilian life. However, I do have to renew my top secret clearance. If in the next 4 months I gotta go back, I damn sure ain't going back as a clerk! Sorry, this demon was spoiled by the quasi-good life.

So with the exception of the deep depression that's it. Oh, I did read Stephanie Meyer's Twilight. Very good. Even for a teen book. If you're a vamp fan like me. I'm sure you'll enjoy it. It's a bit different from most books. It drags until somewhere near pate 350. But before the action starts, there is a lot of character building and plot establishment. So I think a well written book for teens, and a light and pleasant read for adult readers.

Now that's it.

During my fall down the rabbit hole, I dwelt in some series issues: marital distress, self- loathing, loneliness, hopelessness, and death. After discussing this with my therapist (finally) yesterday, she told me at least I'm improving. Two weeks ago, I didn't want to exist. So yes, I have improved. The worst part of depression is where your mind goes when it is floating in the abyss. Mine seems to want to float in complex thoughts about world suffering. I think how Darwinism isn't a theory, but a part of life. As condors, bears, and trees are on the verge of extinction, so are many of the populations of humans.

I know. It is humane to want to save the starving people of Malawi, Lesotho and Zimbabwe, but, it is not always what needs to happen. We you discuss death of innocence, it always puts a thick lump in one's throat. So how shall we save them? Round them up into camps and feed them everyday like livestock? Is that how you would want to live? Oh, but it's the warlords that are responsible. Funny how you remove one and three more pop up to fight for the predecessor spot. In the process the same innocent starving people continue to suffer. Not only that, those people are used to gain funds. Funds that will never go to the people. I don't have an answer. I can only say, those that are willing to risk their lives to free cattle on slaughter farms don't have the same belief for the people in Africa. What about the Iraqis, Afghans, and Iranians? I don't see efforts and celebrities there to help maintain those populations. The only thing I see is herds of people stating we should leave. Again. No answer. I know we can't leave. We dropped the glass of milk in our neighbor's kitchen. We have to stay and clean the mess we made.

One other thing. I dislike stupidity. In general. There's ignorance and there's stupidity. Very few people are ignorant. Many are stupid. Geez, the things that exit the mouths of people. Common courtesy might as well be hope stuck in Pandora's box because that shit never rears it's head in most of the American society. It's like it's okay to be a rude dickhead or a filthy noise slinging cunt! I even see parents being told off by their kids while I'm at work. It takes all my strength to not revert back to my American native heritage of the "Slap-a-ho" tribe! I think that my actually be part of the reason people are dicks. Their parents gave them no incentives to be courtesy and respectful. Had Momma or Papa had knocked the living crap outta little Johnny or Janey when they acted like a fool, maybe people wouldn't be so bad. Anyway. Stick a fork in me.

Here are 3 send offs to get us back in the habit!

The more severe the pain or illness, the more severe will be the necessary changes. These may involve breaking bad habits, or acquiring some new and better ones.
Peter McWilliams, Life 101

You have no control over what the other guy does. You only have control over what you do.
A. J. Kitt

Of those who say nothing, few are silent.
Thomas Neill

Yokai Kifujin